Ryan is done taking naps…sorta.

She won’t nap at the appropriate time, but this is the third day in a row that she has fallen asleep at random times and places. Maybe she has that necrolepsy.

I bet she’s not the only Ryan that’s exhausted right now.

We once assumed that Taylor was one of those climbing toddlers because she would climb onto our couches all the time. Now, two years later, Ryan has shown us that Taylor was actually just scared of heights.

Taylor also never gloated about her climbing conquests.

The kitchen table is a favorite spot because it commonly has goodies on it.

Some goodies are the kind you eat…

…others are the kind you make a mess with. Note: there is a large overlap between these two groups.

Now to be fair, it’s unclear whether Ryan climbed up here. My father-in-law may have just been giving her a bath.

I found out recently that Kristen tried to get me a workbench for Father’s Day. It was one that I had admired at Costco one day. She went back later to find they were all gone. So my gift was that I could get a workbench for the garage. I had two choices on achieving workbenchdom.

I could go to Home Depot, Lowes, or Sears and buy a workbench.

Or I could design and build myself a workbench.

It then occurred to me that having kids meant that there was a third possibility. I decided to design a workbench and manage its construction. When that one fell apart, smelling like carrots and milk, I decided to try again on my own. I am documenting the progress on a page that I call DIY - Catch-22. Enjoy.

Oh, and here’s the worthless one:

Real useful gift, Dorene. Thanks.

It’s a difficult song in Rock Band. Also this:



I wanted everyone to see what my lawn looks like before the DC July weather completely crushes it. Oh yeah, and those are my kids.

I have no idea what the law says about child abuse. I imagine the border surrounding the territory known as Child Abuse is a big gray line. Spanking a kid isn’t against the law. Spanking a kid in the face with a brick is. We may disagree on how gray that border is, but we can all agree that this picture lives in the land-locked heartland of Child Abuse. There is no question.

She cries every time I drink coffee. I think she’s convinced that I’m going to eat her. I have no idea how you undo this sort of psychological damage.

Also, you might think this picture was taken professionally, since only a studio would have these kind of props available. You would be wrong. My wife definitely purchased a giant coffee mug (or possibly a shrink-ray) for this photo. Yet I’m sure I still would have lost the argument referenced in my previous post.

We recently had some professional family portraits taken. My wife takes approximately 600 pictures each month with her billion dollar camera and various million dollar lenses and [insert exaggerated amount] dollar backdrops and props. So, as she can explain, I was very supportive when she said she wanted to pay some other people to take pictures of us. I took a stand and gave an argument based on facts and logic. Fast-forward. We had pictures taken. Also, I owe her a massage, some jewelry, and I have to watch the kids so she can go out. Here is a picture of the kids lying on a burlap sack that we paid someone else to take with a digital SLR…but it wasn’t our digital SLR. That’s key.



It’s too bad I’m not up to Month 35 yet. This would be a perfect picture for a caption:

Taylor: Just give up. You will not get more attention than me.

Ryan: Are you kidding? Look at me. I’m a baby. You don’t stand a chance. Just look at my hat! The readers of this web site have already forgotten that you’re in this photo.

And for those that didn’t notice, a page for Months 23 and 24 was added a couple weeks ago.

I think Taylor has really turned a corner. She’s starting to become useful and thus I’m starting to like her. I’m trying to bestow all my fatherly wisdom on her. For instance, why rake when you have a bagging lawn mower?



Kristen thinks this is unfair because I’m just teaching her to do my work for me. Of course, I’m not the one upstairs playing Peggle while Taylor is burping Ryan.



Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go teach Taylor her next lesson: Why figure out how to assemble the food processor if you have a bagging lawn mower?

ps: Month 22 is new.

I added a few pictures at the beginning of the Rebirth page. When I originally made that page, I wasn’t sure if I was allowed to put up pictures of a pregnant Kristen. It seemed better to wait and ask rather than guess and die.

Months 20 and 21 for Taylor were added. They’re pretty short. I think this is when we had to send the camera back to Canon for repairs. I recommend not leaving your SLR camera within reach of a toddler.

Oh, you probably want a recent picture too. Here.



She learned to swim. I can’t really explain the blisters. We’ve had a lot of mosquitos lately.

I’m starting to think that maybe we never had a second child. Maybe we’re just having the first child again. Can you tell who’s who?



This will make things really easy. We know what to expect. That said, I’ve already added photo albums for Ryan for her first 19 months. You can find them on the right under Taylor Albums.